As the solstice is upon us we usher out the dark and draw in the light. How has your year been? What have you achieved? How have you grown? What is your vision for 2022? What changes did you make this year that supported your wellbeing? What habits did you let go of?
We all crave love and nurture, and we all have the capacity to give that to ourselves and others in bundles if only we knew how. This year I found mother - that deep, deep holding of self, where you find your roots, your solidity on this earth. That abundance of nurture and nature, and even in winter there is sunshine and joy. Meditation was my support here - checking in with myself each day to see what was flowing and to be present with it. As my wise teacher said "What you can be with will let you be." (Nicky Clinch 2021)
Learning to listen was the hardest because I was so disconnected from my body. I didn't want to feel. I didn't know how. I was afraid to feel all that pain and suffering. Afraid of what I would find. But what I found was me.
I spin now on a different axis, coming from a completely different place. I know what is mine and what is someone else's 'stuff.' My boundaries seem more solid - less squishy but still welcoming. I know the deep, deep fear and have sat in the depths of terror and darkness and found the other side - the exact same feeling but this time I call it excitement.
I'm looking forward to 2022, of the adventure called life. But first to finish 2021 in style with family, a roaring fire and and feasting.
Emily x
